Good Men are Found in Good Places

Good Men are Found in Good Places

IN CHURCH sisters are complaining the brothers are boring, out there Women claim the men are irresponsible and non committal.
College girls say their fellow men r broke n young, in offices LADIES will tell you their colleague r dating younger women.
Where are good men? Is it true that good men are no longer available?
Ironically women outside church are now said to be flocking churches in search of good men while inside churches many sisters will tell you that Christian men are boring and not marriage material.


Many Sisters in church want to justify why they have to give in to a secular guys who are more fun as opposed to the dull unresponsive brothers.
In and out of church I have constantly heard this statement: “I never meet good men.”
Listening to men there is now a new cliché of: “you rarely meet a good woman; most will follow you for your money.” Those with well to do careers and stable financially are now accused of following vulnerable men to kill boredom.
If I was God I would pair up all the single men and women searching for partners and help them live happily thereafter, but since I am not the best I can do is spread the gospel of hope.
Among my friends are good bachelors and good spinsters all desiring life partners and often I am so tempted to hook them up but again I am not a matchmaker, there is one in heaven. What is a fact is that whereas I cannot authoritatively give the numbers of the available good men I certainly know that there are some good ones out there.
At times I think that the problem is where our women are looking for the good men. I am not sure you will get some good men in the smoky bar or at the bus stop or at your pity party girls Friday night out.
In most times good men are found by default in college, in the line of duty, service or as you serve God. It is sad to hear women cry they don’t find good men whereas when they won’t show up at team building events or when they are sent to represent the company at a corporate event they leave as soon as they register their names.
It is sad to see the same sisters who complain that there are no good men in church never turn up for Church retreats, weddings or evangelism missions.
I don’t in any way suggest that you attend these activities with the sole mission of netting a good man but you can be sure as you interact in class, at work, a corporate or in church your chances of getting a good man are higher. It is never a shock of how fast relationships made in the bar or the matatu break as compared to the number of couples who met in school or church service.
Isn’t sad when you see girls screaming wildly as they give themselves over to celebrity musicians? I got no problem with having fun at a gig but at least preserve your dignity. I am sure no good man will want you around them after seeing you giving yourself over like a desperado. Interesting enough even those you were raving with will not look at you twice when they are sober.
Good men are not always the bubbly fun loving guys around and in most cases it needs us to take time to learn people to know them.  Most of them are at times wrapped in boring outlook and not so outgoing personalities but once you take time to learn them you discover the gem inside them.
We need to shift our mindset from the love at first sight of the bus stop, atm lobby or on the streets to the gradual kind of love. Let’s embrace the spirit of growing in love which happens when we take time to interact with people on events separate from ‘hunting missions.’
Better a boring man who is home with you and the children and friends other than the fun loving who is always on the move to the next fun town.
Have you ever wondered why men who meet wives in the bar won’t want you close a bar after marrying you? Because they know that often nothing good comes from it.
It is surprising that there is a category of women who want good men who will provide, love them and offer security yet they are not putting effort to be good women. A good man is often attracted to a good woman who knows how to care, keep a home, be submissive and have the qualities of bringing up a responsible family.
In seldom times kind men at a bus stop, a crime scene, rainy day in town or inside a dark elevator under a black out turn out to be spouses but these are rare times, good men are found in good places!
If you want a good man, be a good woman and be in a good place, you are most likely to get one.
Above all I am a firm believer that “all good things come from God” and he graciously gives to those who genuinely ask him.

Masturbation is bad

Masturbation is the process of self-stimulation of the genitals to achieve sexual arousal and pleasure.

It is achieved by massaging, touching or stroking the penis or clitoris several times. Sometimes stimulation is achieved by using various sex toys. This habit can begin in early years of childhood and, if not discouraged, continue into adulthood.

Psychosexual development theorist, Sigmund Freud, well known for his works on early childhood development, suggests that a child’s behavior is oriented towards certain parts of his or her body. According to him, adult behaviours are manifestations of childhood sexual fantasy and desire when the child begins to fondle their private parts. It is important to discourage this habit because it can result to masturbation
in adulthood.

Some people argue that masturbation is healthy because it provides the same benefits as sex does and boosts self-esteem and confidence. Some say it keeps you away from promiscuity.

*Consequences*

Masturbation may bring pleasure for the moment but, it does come with some consequences. The habit often comes with the long-term cost of addiction and other sexual problems. It is no different from being addicted to drugs and alcohol. As with drug addiction, masturbation requires an increasing amount of stimulus to achieve consistent levels of pleasure. This habit needs to be nabbed at the bud before it gets out of hand, failure to which it may result to high levels of addiction. It is should, therefore, be discouraged from the very beginning.

Let’s look at a case in point. Joyce is in a dilemma because her husband masturbates on a daily basis. She complains: “He even leaves me in bed to go to the bathroom to do his ritual. Can he change?”

Her partner is addicted to it. He is ashamed, feels guilty, dirty and bad about it, but has been unable to stop. Many people assume it is only men who have this addiction, but surprisingly women do too.

Mary is a case in point. She confesses that she enjoys it so much because she has been in a long distant relationship, and this is the only mode of killing sexual urges. She says it has helped her stay faithful to the relationship. Now that the partner is back home, she is not deriving as much pleasure as she achieves while on her own.

Yes, masturbation may provide immediate gratification, but it has negative sides.

Masturbation may begin as a habit that is enjoyed occasionally, but may eventually become addictive. Sex is a relational, wonderful experience, where we give in to a partner’s needs. If one has been serving their
desires habitually, they may find it difficult to give attention to their partner. Masturbation destroys the ability to relate to another person sexually and conditions one’s body to respond to self-stimulation seeking self-satisfaction.

Stop Masturbation, it destroys relationships, marriages and finally your self esteem.

unlock & activate Chinese Mobile IMEI Number Online

Are you using China mobile phone with fake IMEI numbers ? Now you can unlock & activate Chinese Mobile IMEI Number Online.

What is IMEI Number?
 To get the IMEI number press *#06# keys on your mobile handset. IMEI number is in AAAAAA-BB-CCCCCC-D format:

Details of IMEI Number-
AAAAA – Type of the phone
BB – Manufacturing country code
CCCCC – Phone serial number
D – IMEI Verifier

How to Check if IMEI Number on Mobile Phone is Valid?
Type *#06# . It will give you the IMEI number of your Mobile. Otherwise check the compliance plate under the battery.

Note down the IMEI number and send it to 53232 via SMS.

The format should be IMEI . If IMEI number is valid you will receive a Success message. Users may also validate online by visiting website numbering plans. Enter IMEI number in a valid format. For Example: 350077-52-323751-3.

You will get information regarding manufacturer, model type, and country of approval of a handset.

Using GII program, one can implant a new IMEI number on blocked phones.

The 48 Laws of Power

The 48 Laws of Power

by Robert Greene and Joost Elffers

Law 1

Never Outshine the Master

Always make those above you feel comfortably superior. In your desire to please or impress them, do not go too far in displaying your talents or you might accomplish the opposite – inspire fear and insecurity. Make your masters appear more brilliant than they are and you will attain the heights of power.

Law 2

Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies

Be wary of friends-they will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. In fact, you have more to fear from friends than from enemies. If you have no enemies, find a way to make them.

Law 3

Conceal your Intentions

Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. If they have no clue what you are up to, they cannot prepare a defense. Guide them far enough down the wrong path, envelope them in enough smoke, and by the time they realize your intentions, it will be too late.

Law 4

Always Say Less than Necessary

When you are trying to impress people with words, the more you say, the more common you appear, and the less in control. Even if you are saying something banal, it will seem original if you make it vague, open-ended, and sphinxlike. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. The more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish.

Law 5

So Much Depends on Reputation – Guard it with your Life

Reputation is the cornerstone of power. Through reputation alone you can intimidate and win; once you slip, however, you are vulnerable, and will be attacked on all sides. Make your reputation unassailable. Always be alert to potential attacks and thwart them before they happen. Meanwhile, learn to destroy your enemies by opening holes in their own reputations. Then stand aside and let public opinion hang them.

Law 6

Court Attention at all Cost

Everything is judged by its appearance; what is unseen counts for nothing. Never let yourself get lost in the crowd, then, or buried in oblivion. Stand out. Be conspicuous, at all cost. Make yourself a magnet of attention by appearing larger, more colorful, more mysterious, than the bland and timid masses.

Law 7

Get others to do the Work for you, but Always Take the Credit

Use the wisdom, knowledge, and legwork of other people to further your own cause. Not only will such assistance save you valuable time and energy, it will give you a godlike aura of efficiency and speed. In the end your helpers will be forgotten and you will be remembered. Never do yourself what others can do for you.

Law 8

Make other People come to you – use Bait if Necessary

When you force the other person to act, you are the one in control. It is always better to make your opponent come to you, abandoning his own plans in the process. Lure him with fabulous gains – then attack. You hold the cards.

Law 9

Win through your Actions, Never through Argument

Any momentary triumph you think gained through argument is really a Pyrrhic victory: The resentment and ill will you stir up is stronger and lasts longer than any momentary change of opinion. It is much more powerful to get others to agree with you through your actions, without saying a word. Demonstrate, do not explicate.

Law 10

Infection: Avoid the Unhappy and Unlucky

You can die from someone else’s misery – emotional states are as infectious as disease. You may feel you are helping the drowning man but you are only precipitating your own disaster. The unfortunate sometimes draw misfortune on themselves; they will also draw it on you. Associate with the happy and fortunate instead.

Law 11

Learn to Keep People Dependent on You

To maintain your independence you must always be needed and wanted. The more you are relied on, the more freedom you have. Make people depend on you for their happiness and prosperity and you have nothing to fear. Never teach them enough so that they can do without you.

Law 12

Use Selective Honesty and Generosity to Disarm your Victim

One sincere and honest move will cover over dozens of dishonest ones. Open-hearted gestures of honesty and generosity bring down the guard of even the most suspicious people. Once your selective honesty opens a hole in their armor, you can deceive and manipulate them at will. A timely gift – a Trojan horse – will serve the same purpose.

Law 13

When Asking for Help, Appeal to People’s Self-Interest,

Never to their Mercy or Gratitude

If you need to turn to an ally for help, do not bother to remind him of your past assistance and good deeds. He will find a way to ignore you. Instead, uncover something in your request, or in your alliance with him, that will benefit him, and emphasize it out of all proportion. He will respond enthusiastically when he sees something to be gained for himself.

Law 14

Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy

Knowing about your rival is critical. Use spies to gather valuable information that will keep you a step ahead. Better still: Play the spy yourself. In polite social encounters, learn to probe. Ask indirect questions to get people to reveal their weaknesses and intentions. There is no occasion that is not an opportunity for artful spying.

Law 15

Crush your Enemy Totally

All great leaders since Moses have known that a feared enemy must be crushed completely. (Sometimes they have learned this the hard way.) If one ember is left alight, no matter how dimly it smolders, a fire will eventually break out. More is lost through stopping halfway than through total annihilation: The enemy will recover, and will seek revenge. Crush him, not only in body but in spirit.

Law 16

Use Absence to Increase Respect and Honor

Too much circulation makes the price go down: The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group, temporary withdrawal from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity.

Law 17

Keep Others in Suspended Terror: Cultivate an Air of Unpredictability

Humans are creatures of habit with an insatiable need to see familiarity in other people’s actions. Your predictability gives them a sense of control. Turn the tables: Be deliberately unpredictable. Behavior that seems to have no consistency or purpose will keep them off-balance, and they will wear themselves out trying to explain your moves. Taken to an extreme, this strategy can intimidate and terrorize.

Law 18

Do Not Build Fortresses to Protect Yourself – Isolation is Dangerous

The world is dangerous and enemies are everywhere – everyone has to protect themselves. A fortress seems the safest. But isolation exposes you to more dangers than it protects you from – it cuts you off from valuable information, it makes you conspicuous and an easy target. Better to circulate among people find allies, mingle. You are shielded from your enemies by the crowd.

Law 19

Know Who You’re Dealing with – Do Not Offend the Wrong Person

There are many different kinds of people in the world, and you can never assume that everyone will react to your strategies in the same way. Deceive or outmaneuver some people and they will spend the rest of their lives seeking revenge. They are wolves in lambs’ clothing. Choose your victims and opponents carefully, then – never offend or deceive the wrong person.

Law 20

Do Not Commit to Anyone

It is the fool who always rushes to take sides. Do not commit to any side or cause but yourself. By maintaining your independence, you become the master of others – playing people against one another, making them pursue you.

Law 21

Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker – Seem Dumber than your Mark

No one likes feeling stupider than the next persons. The trick is to make your victims feel smart – and not just smart, but smarter than you are. Once convinced of this, they will never suspect that you may have ulterior motives.

Law 22

Use the Surrender Tactic: Transform Weakness into Power

When you are weaker, never fight for honor’s sake; choose surrender instead. Surrender gives you time to recover, time to torment and irritate your conqueror, time to wait for his power to wane. Do not give him the satisfaction of fighting and defeating you – surrender first. By turning the other check you infuriate and unsettle him. Make surrender a tool of power.

Law 23

Concentrate Your Forces

Conserve your forces and energies by keeping them concentrated at their strongest point. You gain more by finding a rich mine and mining it deeper, than by flitting from one shallow mine to another – intensity defeats extensity every time. When looking for sources of power to elevate you, find the one key patron, the fat cow who will give you milk for a long time to come.

Law 24

Play the Perfect Courtier

The perfect courtier thrives in a world where everything revolves around power and political dexterity. He has mastered the art of indirection; he flatters, yields to superiors, and asserts power over others in the mot oblique and graceful manner. Learn and apply the laws of courtiership and there will be no limit to how far you can rise in the court.

Law 25

Re-Create Yourself

Do not accept the roles that society foists on you. Re-create yourself by forging a new identity, one that commands attention and never bores the audience. Be the master of your own image rather than letting others define if for you. Incorporate dramatic devices into your public gestures and actions – your power will be enhanced and your character will seem larger than life.

Law 26

Keep Your Hands Clean

You must seem a paragon of civility and efficiency: Your hands are never soiled by mistakes and nasty deeds. Maintain such a spotless appearance by using others as scapegoats and cat’s-paws to disguise your involvement.

Law 27

Play on People’s Need to Believe to Create a Cultlike Following

People have an overwhelming desire to believe in something. Become the focal point of such desire by offering them a cause, a new faith to follow. Keep your words vague but full of promise; emphasize enthusiasm over rationality and clear thinking. Give your new disciples rituals to perform, ask them to make sacrifices on your behalf. In the absence of organized religion and grand causes, your new belief system will bring you untold power.

Law 28

Enter Action with Boldness

If you are unsure of a course of action, do not attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous: Better to enter with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. Everyone admires the bold; no one honors the timid.

Law 29

Plan All the Way to the End

The ending is everything. Plan all the way to it, taking into account all the possible consequences, obstacles, and twists of fortune that might reverse your hard work and give the glory to others. By planning to the end you will not be overwhelmed by circumstances and you will know when to stop. Gently guide fortune and help determine the future by thinking far ahead.

Law 30

Make your Accomplishments Seem Effortless

Your actions must seem natural and executed with ease. All the toil and practice that go into them, and also all the clever tricks, must be concealed. When you act, act effortlessly, as if you could do much more. Avoid the temptation of revealing how hard you work – it only raises questions. Teach no one your tricks or they will be used against you.

Law 31

Control the Options: Get Others to Play with the Cards you Deal

The best deceptions are the ones that seem to give the other person a choice: Your victims feel they are in control, but are actually your puppets. Give people options that come out in your favor whichever one they choose. Force them to make choices between the lesser of two evils, both of which serve your purpose. Put them on the horns of a dilemma: They are gored wherever they turn.

Law 32

Play to People’s Fantasies

The truth is often avoided because it is ugly and unpleasant. Never appeal to truth and reality unless you are prepared for the anger that comes for disenchantment. Life is so harsh and distressing that people who can manufacture romance or conjure up fantasy are like oases in the desert: Everyone flocks to them. There is great power in tapping into the fantasies of the masses.

Law 33

Discover Each Man’s Thumbscrew

Everyone has a weakness, a gap in the castle wall. That weakness is usual y an insecurity, an uncontrollable emotion or need; it can also be a small secret pleasure. Either way, once found, it is a thumbscrew you can turn to your advantage.

Law 34

Be Royal in your Own Fashion: Act like a King to be treated like one

The way you carry yourself will often determine how you are treated; In the long run, appearing vulgar or common will make people disrespect you. For a king respects himself and inspires the same sentiment in others. By acting regally and confident of your powers, you make yourself seem destined to wear a crown.

Law 35

Master the Art of Timing

Never seem to be in a hurry – hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself, and over time. Always seem patient, as if you know that everything will come to you eventually. Become a detective of the right moment; sniff out the spirit of the times, the trends that will carry you to power. Learn to stand back when the time is not yet ripe, and to strike fiercely when it has reached fruition.

Law 36

Disdain Things you cannot have: Ignoring them is the best Revenge

By acknowledging a petty problem you give it existence and credibility. The more attention you pay an enemy, the stronger you make him; and a small mistake is often made worse and more visible when you try to fix it. It is sometimes best to leave things alone. If there is something you want but cannot have, show contempt for it. The less interest you reveal, the more superior you seem.

Law 37

Create Compelling Spectacles

Striking imagery and grand symbolic gestures create the aura of power – everyone responds to them. Stage spectacles for those around you, then full of arresting visuals and radiant symbols that heighten your presence. Dazzled by appearances, no one will notice what you are really doing.

Law 38

Think as you like but Behave like others

If you make a show of going against the times, flaunting your unconventional ideas and unorthodox ways, people will think that you only want attention and that you look down upon them. They will find a way to punish you for making them feel inferior. It is far safer to blend in and nurture the common touch. Share your originality only with tolerant friends and those who are sure to appreciate your uniqueness.

Law 39

Stir up Waters to Catch Fish

Anger and emotion are strategically counterproductive. You must always stay calm and objective. But if you can make your enemies angry while staying calm yourself, you gain a decided advantage. Put your enemies off-balance: Find the chink in their vanity through which you can rattle them and you hold the strings.

Law 40

Despise the Free Lunch

What is offered for free is dangerous – it usually involves either a trick or a hidden obligation. What has worth is worth paying for. By paying your own way you stay clear of gratitude, guilt, and deceit. It is also often wise to pay the full price – there is no cutting corners with excellence. Be lavish with your money and keep it circulating, for generosity is a sign and a magnet for power.

Law 41

Avoid Stepping into a Great Man’s Shoes

What happens first always appears better and more original than what comes after. If you succeed a great man or have a famous parent, you will have to accomplish double their achievements to outshine them. Do not get lost in their shadow, or stuck in a past not of your own making: Establish your own name and identity by changing course. Slay the overbearing father, disparage his legacy, and gain power by shining in your own way.

Law 42

Strike the Shepherd and the Sheep will Scatter

Trouble can often be traced to a single strong individual – the stirrer, the arrogant underling, the poisoned of goodwill. If you allow such people room to operate, others will succumb to their influence. Do not wait for the troubles they cause to multiply, do not try to negotiate with them – they are irredeemable. Neutralize their influence by isolating or banishing them. Strike at the source of the trouble and the sheep will scatter.

Law 43

Work on the Hearts and Minds of Others

Coercion creates a reaction that will eventually work against you. You must seduce others into wanting to move in your direction. A person you have seduced becomes your loyal pawn. And the way to seduce others is to operate on their individual psychologies and weaknesses. Soften up the resistant by working on their emotions, playing on what they hold dear and what they fear. Ignore the hearts and minds of others and they will grow to hate you.

Law 44

Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect

The mirror reflects reality, but it is also the perfect tool for deception: When you mirror your enemies, doing exactly as they do, they cannot figure out your strategy. The Mirror Effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact. By holding up a mirror to their psyches, you seduce them with the illusion that you share their values; by holding up a mirror to their actions, you teach them a lesson. Few can resist the power of Mirror Effect.

Law 45

Preach the Need for Change, but Never Reform too much at Once

Everyone understands the need for change in the abstract, but on the day-to-day level people are creatures of habit. Too much innovation is traumatic, and will lead to revolt. If you are new to a position of power, or an outsider trying to build a power base, make a show of respecting the old way of doing things. If change is necessary, make it feel like a gentle improvement on the past.

Law 46

Never appear too Perfect

Appearing better than others is always dangerous, but most dangerous of all is to appear to have no faults or weaknesses. Envy creates silent enemies. It is smart to occasionally display defects, and admit to harmless vices, in order to deflect envy and appear more human and approachable. Only gods and the dead can seem perfect with impunity.

Law 47

Do not go Past the Mark you Aimed for; In Victory, Learn when to Stop

The moment of victory is often the moment of greatest peril. In the heat of victory, arrogance and overconfidence can push you past the goal you had aimed for, and by going too far, you make more enemies than you defeat. Do not allow success to go to your head. There is no substitute for strategy and careful planning. Set a goal, and when you reach it, stop.

Law 48

Assume Formlessness

By taking a shape, by having a visible plan, you open yourself to attack. Instead of taking a form for your enemy to grasp, keep yourself adaptable and on the move. Accept the fact that nothing is certain and no law is fixed. The best way to protect yourself is to be as fluid and formless as water; never bet on stability or lasting order. Everything changes.